I used to open those gates with a special sense of feeling......( a feeling that sprouts from intense admiration , respect !)...I knew I was entering the house of God...( of course! I was entering the temple of dance...). I involuntarily prayed..." let all my actions and words be always right!"...
I was always welcomed by his compassionate smile and kind words! They immediately put me at ease! No one had to prompt me to fall at his feet and seek his blessings! It just happened . He was always at Padukka's side , like a pillar of strength , with whose support and companionship , the artiste in her bloomed.
Last week I was in an elated mood! The music and rhythm that emanated from my music system would invite me into a world of dance ...which would raise my spirits ....and all three of us ( my two little boys and me) would dance around in our living room ..energizing every cell in our body...later plunge on to our couch , on top of each other , our walls echoing enchanted giggles! That night , I dream t of him! As usual beside his sister and my Guru.
" May God bless you, ma!" he echoed in his usual affectionate tone.
I reflected on my dream the next day....and came to a conclusion that I was contemplating too much on my days at Chennai , and my dance classes!
Yesterday , my Amma called from India ......" Balanna is no more!.... he passed away!"
My hands went cold .... and I replayed my dream once again....
" When?" I asked....feeling a burner glowing in my stomach!
"5 days back!", came the reply.
It must be my flight of imagination , or just an accidental co incidence of incidents!.....I like to believe that passport and visa were not hindrances for him , after he left his body....so that he could come and bestow his blessings on me!
I felt a pain rolling in my throat....trying to find a vent!... But I knew for sure that I was blessed!
Yes , when I open those gates again, I will no longer be welcomed by his kind talk and compassionate smile....
Yes ,who ever came across him will miss his presence!...
May his blessings and good will ....that he has left behind....kindle our spirits ....and enlighten our lives!
